-->
Ihavesoughtlove, first, becauseitbringsecstasy---ecstasysogreatthatIwouldoftenhavesacrificedalltherestofmylifeforafewhoursforthisjoy. Ihavesoughtit, next, becauseitrelievesloneliness---thatterriblelonelinessinwhichoneshiveringconsciousnesslooksovertherimoftheworldintothecoldunfathomablelifelessabyss. Ihavesoughtit, finally, becauseintheunionofloveIhaveseen, inamysticminiature, theprefiguringvisionoftheheaventhatsaintsandpoetshaveimagined. ThisiswhatIsought, andthoughitmightseemtoogoodforhumanlife, thisiswhat---atlast---Ihavefound.
WithequalpassionIhavesoughtknowledge. Ihavewishedtounderstandtheheartsofmen. Ihavewishedtoknowwhythestarsshine. AndIhavetriedtoapprehendthePythagoreanpowerbywhichnumberholdsswayabovetheflux. Alittleofthis, butnotmuch, Ihaveachieved.
Loveandknowledge, sofarastheywerepossible, ledupwardtowardtheheavens. Butalwaysitbroughtmebacktoearth. Echoesofcriesofpainreverberateinmyheart. Childreninfamine, victimstorturedbyoppressors, helplessoldpeopleahatedburdentotheirsons, andthewholeworldofloneliness, poverty, andpainmakeamockeryofwhathumanlifeshouldbe. Ilongtoalleviatetheevil, butIcannot, andItoosuffer.
Thishasbeenmylife. Ihavefounditworthliving, andwouldgladlyliveitagainifthechancewereofferedme.
返回查字典首页>>